The end.

Beyond that, it’s just summer as always. Reading books, exercising, working like a mule, etc., etc. Just more prepping for college. I need to buy my laptop and whatnot, and I’m trying to compile a list, unsuccessfully.  It’s a rather selfish decision of mine, going off, and I feel extremely guilty and worried as to how they’ll fare without me, but it’s been done. I’m going to try my hardest at NW for the sake of the people I’ve moved on from, as selfish as that does sound.

Surprisingly, I’ve hung out with a fair number of people this summer. I’m not going to lie, but most of the time I’d rather stay at home or just chill by myself. As such, it takes a good deal of mental exertion for me to gather up the will to chill with others.  The problem lies only in getting there, because once I’m with them I’m okay with it. So I really do like and appreciate my friends, even though I might not show it.

I’m not sure how much this counts as an update, but hey, what can I say? It is what it is. I’ll start a new blog once college actually rolls around, which won’t be for another 2.5 months. Until then, I’ll enjoy my summer with others.

Oh, and I watched Karate Kid. And I’ll be watching The Last Airbender. Summer is time for movies, for me. Hopefully other cool ones will come out.

I only get this feeling when I’m under enormous pressure, or if I’ve done something extremely stupid that is hard to fix.

Why must people keep ragging on me? Don’t they understand that THERE IS NO WAY I’M GOING TO CHANGE MY MIND AT THIS POINT. I’ve already put in my deposit and rejected the scholarship.  Tough beans. Wait for two years, if I change by then.

Just let me get excited to go. Naturally, there are things to worry about. But shouldn’t they know that I’m a responsible person? I’m not the stupid teen who goes out after dark without reporting where I am. I’m the one who is already on the way home by the time they call to check up on me.  Ugh.

Plus, I’ve just recently had most of my AP tests right? I still have one left. Enormous pressure. Ginormous pressure. Humongous pressure. My skin is breaking out because of this, comprende? Geez.

I’m going. It’s been decided.

That aside, I haven’t updated because I’m writing more in my journal lately. Although, this is like a journal too, neh?

I’m going to start a new one soon. Just because I don’t feel this one quite represents me as I am, anymore.

Should I get a description?  Sometimes it’s difficult…

Type A

People with blood type A have a deep-rooted strength that helps them stay calm in a crisis when everyone else is panicking. However, they tend to avoid confrontation, and feel very uncomfortable around people. A types are shy and sometimes withdrawn. They seek harmony and are very polite, but all the same feel that they never really fit in with others. A types are very responsible. If there is a job to be done, they prefer to take care of it themselves. These people crave success and are perfectionists. They are also very creative, and the most artistic of all the blood types, most likely because of their sensitivity.

I think that sounds relatively like me, neh?  I’ve just been thinking that I’m such a type A.  I need a break.  Or something.  Move on with life, haha.

At any rate, I’ve rediscovered my love for KAT-TUN.  I impulsively spent a good deal, to me, of money on their calendar.  However, I am looking forward to it ^^

I also need some endorphins.  Crucially.  I’ve been thinking about playing some tennis recently.  I need to go find time to do that.  Just a wall would be nice.  I can’t say I’m too big a fan of running, but maybe I’m just missing some things.  It’s okay some times.

I am also seriously, extremely behind in almost all my homework.  Especially Chemistry.  And I need to start learning the new Calculus stuff, as soon as this next test is over.  Also…I’m thinking I should get the study guide for government, yeah?  Since I can’t say I pay too much attention in that class… What else…Finish and start the books for English? Yeah.  I really need to start reading more.  And that’s about it.

じゃね～

For me, artists are people who can just whip out amazing pieces out of their head.  Who have that creativity and can just let the images flow from the head through to the hand and on to the paper.

Hence, I am not really an artist.  I’m more the logical type, yeah.

So, when I was pretty much told that I had talent as an artist by Ms. Hunter, I was ecstatic and elated.

Honestly, I haven’t really done any art since 9th grade, and even then it wasn’t all that great.  Especially because of the teacher.  It really made me happy that someone would consider me as having talent in art, since I’m usually immersed in books and science and whatnot.

So I’m really rather happy.  Because I’m okay at art, and that’s good.  So even though it’s kind of difficult for me, it’s renewed my energy for it.  I will be sure to work hard.

In other news, I love my little sister so much.  She’s so funny, and she totally understands me.  If I don’t have any other best friends or just friends period, there will always be my little sis.  She’s willing to do so much so that I can “fulfill my potential”, if I even have any.  She’s so smart too, and I’m always pressuring her.  I feel bad, because I am most definitely taking her at face value, even though she is so so much more.  I’m so sorry!  But I definitely totally love you!

But I’m so, so grateful to have all my awesome as possum friends and family around me.

I can’t say that I’m ever really happy, but it’s great when I am.

I think of all those wonderful people who are around me every day and I am so super thankful.

I know it takes a lot to deal with me, because I’m a rather vitriolic and cynical person often times.

But I love them so, so much more.

Through all those awkward moments, and funny moments, and twitchy moments…

All the better.

Umm…yeah.

Which in turn led me to decided to write on my own blog.

Yeah.

And so!

I promise, that I will be a better student.

And that means that I will study in advance for my anatomy tests.

And review for my chemistry tests much much more,

And finish my homework ahead of time,

And sleep more so I can stay awake in class,

Among others.

Yes.

So uh, just an update to my life, I guess.  Well. I’m tired of school. I have senioritis, but I still go to school. How devoted I am.  It’s the end of the term, which means basically I gotta get all my stuff done.  Which means my paintings.  I’m kinda worried for my grade in Chem, but it’ll be fine.  Just gotta get through this year. And the next. And the next. How repetitive.  I’m taking a class during the spring semester at SLCC too.  Though I really don’t want to.  And there’s also the sudden surprise that I’ve actually gotta take the Human Geography test too.  I really outta get studying on that.  Only four more months.  Ick.  I might end up going to Japan over the summer with my buddy. That’d be exciting.  Other than most the rest of that stuff, the rest of my senior year should be pretty chill.  I’ve kinda made an unconscious resolution to keep up with my schoolwork.  I do fall behind, startling as that may be.

In other news. I’ve taken a reliking to Kingdom Hearts.  Same process, once again.  I wonder how long it’ll be til the sequel.  Three years, perhaps?  Maybe longer…Oh well.  I’ll be waiting.  And with that, I’ve decided to get a PS2. Yes. 2.  So that I can play the KH games.  I am absolutely in love with that series.  The depth, the characters, the ideas. It’s great. I’m going to commemorate with a poster.

In other other news.  I feel like I never really have anything worthwhile to say. I’m kinda facing an identity crisis. Too much stress, perhaps? I mean, all I ever do is eat, sleep, work, and play on the computer.  I’d like some variety.  I’m way freaked for college too, honestly.  That’s kind of another tale though.  I mean, I waste my free time because I don’t have the free time to waste.  I don’t know if that makes sense, but that’s the way it is.  There’s so much stuff I’d like to do, or at least attempt, or at least get over with, if only I had the time.  Grr. Oh well.

And that’s the end of that.  Don’t really feel like much more ATM.  So toodles.

I really like having long, long hair, but the process of growing it out is so annoying.  I don’t like to cut my bangs, because I’m horrible at it.  So I don’t cut them, and now they are to my lips.  Sometimes I really feel like just chopping it off because of all the hair that falls out when I wash it.  But it appears that that is relatively normal, so I’m slightly appeased.  I’ve decided to leave it as long as I can, so that it looks really pretty when I have it all done up for prom and whatnot.  Yeah.

Senior year is really a breeze.  None of the classes are really that hard, not even calculus.  I can’t wait until first semester is over, because that means no more financial lit or communications.  However, with second semester comes super hard work time.  Because I’ll have two classes after school at SLCC twice a week.  Which means I will need to make sure I have everything else done in advance, pretty much.  I think I’ll be able to handle it.  I’m literally praying and hoping that the SLCC teachers will be easy.  And I need to make sure to finish my Health stuff very very soon.  Please, please concentrate during Christmas break!  This is pretty much a list, but that’s okay.  I like school.  I can see my friends, and my social ineptitude isn’t as big of a problem there. I’m okay with being socially inept.  It’ll be harder later on, but I think I’ll survive.